Aloha, mutants! It’s that time of year once again when couples are forced to spend lots of money on each other while the single folk get to laugh manically whilst eating alone in their dark, empty studio apartments. (More of a laugh-cry, really.) In either case, Valentine’s Day is clearly a holiday for losers.

To help make the day a little more bearable, I’ve whipped up some free valentines for you to share, email, print out, burn, and curse.

I made 11 of these last year (find ’em here), but they ended up being very small in size. This year I upped it to 16 and they’re all much bigger – that way it’s easier to see all the terrible details. Enjoy and share with the one you love hate!