STUFF THAT SCARED ME: ALICE, SWEET ALICE

Church is scary, man.

The musty smell of bibles, the bland and antiquated interiors, the old people, the chanting, the fear, the guilt, the penance, the seriousness of it all. The murder, the immolation. Well, at least I thought those last two were regular happenings at church. Continue reading STUFF THAT SCARED ME: ALICE, SWEET ALICE

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Randy!

As much as it pains me to say, I feel like I have a lot in common with Scream‘s resident nerd, Randy Meeks (played by Jamie Kennedy). In fact, I kind of consider him a gasp!choke!…kindred spirit. He’s a high-strung horror fanatic*, the oddest within his friend circle**, who works part-time at a video store*** and bores those around him with his endless pontifications on horror rules and theories****. We’re almost two peas in a pod really. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Randy!

STUFF THAT SCARED ME: A Home Recording of A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3

It was the late-’80s, and we were smack dab in the middle of The Great VHS Boom. I believe it was Herbert Hoover who once promised, “a VCR in every home, and a membership to every mom & pop video store” – and that’s exactly what every family (including ours) had. And with the proliferation of VCRs came a wave of home recordings. No rental was safe from being recorded to a blank Kodak tape (or Polaroid, Sony, RCA, Fuji, et al.) You just had to make sure your recording speed was set to LP, and to put a little piece o’tape over that broken tab on the back, and you were in business. Sure, it was illegal. But it was the ’80s, and everyone was doing it. Continue reading STUFF THAT SCARED ME: A Home Recording of A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3

ARTISTS BEHIND THE IMAGE: Robert Tanenbaum

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ARTISTS BEHIND THE IMAGE is intended to put a name (and sometimes face) to the talented men and women who created the most iconic images to adorn horror VHS boxes and posters from ’70s, ’80s, and ’90s. Their art is vital; it’s the reason I (and many of you, certainly) fell in love with horror movies in the first place. This is not only intended as a tribute, but also a minor compendium, meant to collect their works in one single spot. Corrections, additions, or other info? Email me.

Prior to college, Robert Tanenbaum had no formal art training – but that didn’t stop him from winning first place in the portrait competition while only a freshman at Washington University. His innate talent for portraiture took off from there, and he hasn’t stopped to look back since.

Adept at watercolors, oils, and acrylics – and with a distinct style reminiscent of Norman Rockwell – Tanenbaum has been in constant demand since his career began. He’s been commissioned over 200 times to paint the portraits of various movie stars, sports figures, and even heads of corporations. He’s painted many several collections of Franklin Mint collector’s plates. He is a Signature Member of the National Watercolor Society; one of 22 members out of 1300 members to be nationally certified by The American Portrait Society;  one of only 350 that has been elected as an Artist member of the California Art Club and an artist member of National Society of Painters in Casein and Acrylic. His work has been featured in numerous magazines and art shows. Continue reading ARTISTS BEHIND THE IMAGE: Robert Tanenbaum

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Richie!

Miles Chapin’s “Richie”, from Tobe Hooper’s The Funhouse, is the perfect embodiment of the troped-out ’80s horror that was happening at the time: he’s a high schooler who looks to be in his late-20s (possibly early-30s); he’s an insufferable WASPy geek, yet has a gorgeous girlfriend; and, despite being a bespectacled lame-o, his best friend is the high school football team’s all-star quarterback, Buzz Dawson. It was the ’80s, baby. It didn’t have to make sense as long as everyone was so obnoxious that you rooted for the bad guy.

Richie is also a wannabe preppy, which makes him even more detestable. Imagine a combination of Tim Matheson’s snarky shit-eating expressions mixed with Harry Anderson’s general punchability, and you’ve got your basic Richie. Every time he opens his mouth, you just know some dumb shit is gonna come out of it. And that’s something that people often fail to realize about geeks: not all of them are smart. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Richie!

SUMMERTIME SCARES! (Barry Foster)

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And last but not least – the final entry in this year’s SUMMERTIME SCARES! is from my buddy Barry. Like me, he too is a lifelong horror nut and appreciator of all things nostalgic and trashy (and those precious gems that meet somewhere in the middle). So who better to wrap this thing up than him? Barry shows his love for a couple of perfect summertime flicks: a Drew Barrymore one-two punch of Motorama and Far From Home. Without further ado…take it away, Barry! Continue reading SUMMERTIME SCARES! (Barry Foster)

Horrorstuffs & humor / don't tell yer granny