Tag Archives: geek

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Tom & Terry!

This is it, mutants! We’ve made it to the final entry in my year-long serial, Horror Nerd of the Month. I want to extend a big thank you to those of you who have faithfully followed over the past 12 months, commenting, liking, sharing, and all that other good stuff. And can that really be true? 12 months already? It feels like just yesterday that I posted the first entry in this exercise of monthly moronics; CV’s introductory nerd was poor Jerry, from The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. I can hear his virginal death shriek in my head as I type this.

There wasn’t technically a horror nerd for November, but I wouldn’t dare slight you which is why I’m doubling up this month. That’s right: December’s HNotM is a twofer! And what a twofer!

May I present Tom (Tom Casiello) from Woodchipper Massacre, and Terry (Louis Tripp) from The Gate. It only makes sense that I’d pair these two up: both are bespectacled redheads with a penchant for rock. But despite their love of flaming solos and killer air guitar, these guys are absolute zeros on the Cool Dude scale.

Below I offer visual evidence of their cringe-inducing flopping about whilst in the privacy of their own respective rooms. We’ve all been there, sure. But these guys, well, it’s not helping their cases.

Until next year, mutants!

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HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Randy!

As much as it pains me to say, I feel like I have a lot in common with Scream‘s resident nerd, Randy Meeks (played by Jamie Kennedy). In fact, I kind of consider him a gasp!choke!…kindred spirit. He’s a high-strung horror fanatic*, the oddest within his friend circle**, who works part-time at a video store*** and bores those around him with his endless pontifications on horror rules and theories****. We’re almost two peas in a pod really. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Randy!

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Richie!

Miles Chapin’s “Richie”, from Tobe Hooper’s The Funhouse, is the perfect embodiment of the troped-out ’80s horror that was happening at the time: he’s a high schooler who looks to be in his late-20s (possibly early-30s); he’s an insufferable WASPy geek, yet has a gorgeous girlfriend; and, despite being a bespectacled lame-o, his best friend is the high school football team’s all-star quarterback, Buzz Dawson. It was the ’80s, baby. It didn’t have to make sense as long as everyone was so obnoxious that you rooted for the bad guy.

Richie is also a wannabe preppy, which makes him even more detestable. Imagine a combination of Tim Matheson’s snarky shit-eating expressions mixed with Harry Anderson’s general punchability, and you’ve got your basic Richie. Every time he opens his mouth, you just know some dumb shit is gonna come out of it. And that’s something that people often fail to realize about geeks: not all of them are smart. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Richie!

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH — Ryan!

The first installment of Horror Nerd of the Month focused on Jerry, a character from the original The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, and here we are, only a handful of months later, and I’m already revisiting the franchise, this time focusing on someone who makes Jerry look like Paul Newman in comparison: Ryan.

We’re first introduced to Ryan whilst on a road trip through Texas with his soon-to-be ex-girlfriend, Michelle. From the second we meet his character it is immediately clear that Michelle is totally out of his league. It’s revealed that the reason for their split is she’s attending college out of state and doesn’t want to do the long distance relationship thing…but c’mon – we know why she’s really dumping him: he’s a total lame-o.

Even in death, Ryan is humiliated: while he’s hung upside-down by hooks through his ankles and about to be delivered a deathblow via sledgehammer, two members of the Sawyer clan feel the need to point out his colored undies (“California!”), which is met with laughter from the rest of the demented family. As unsettling of a scene as it is, it confirms a long-held belief: nerds just can’t catch a break.

Ryan, we salute you.

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Arnie!

When we ‘re first introduced to our bespectacled bore, Arnie Cunningham, he’s frantically running from his house hurrying to catch his ride to school. In the process, he rips open the bag of trash he’s taking out – spilling it all over the driveway and his mother’s feet. She shoos him on, and he waddles off – arms akimbo, glasses sliding off his face – to his friend’s car. It’s the quintessential “Yes, this character is a nerd with a capital N” introduction, something that I’ve covered here before. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Arnie!

HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Evil Ed!

When you hear the name “Evil Ed”, what do you imagine? A big bearded dude with a dangly skull earring and leather vest, tearing ass through town on a chopper with those big angular ape hangers? Yeah, me too.

The “Evil Ed” we get in Fright Night, however, is pretty much the exact opposite of that: a diminutive, giggly geek with a penchant for pranks whose demeanor is best described as “repellant”. Continue reading HORROR NERD OF THE MONTH: Evil Ed!